Ah Valentine’s day. Here are some adorable ways to get around the cliche of stuffed teddies.
It will earn you a slight shake of the head, a little sideways glance. Perhaps a coy smile and utterance of ‘oh, you silly thing you’.
And then, voila. Sex. (Hopefully)
Give your loved one the gift of roses. FIVE roses.
You always whisper about wanting to give her the world. Now you can:
You can place this in a little box and when they open it, you’re pretty sure to get laid by the sheer adorableness of you.
If your lover is more the ‘paper back’ kind of person, you can write a little inscription in the front. Something to be treasured forever. Longevity of your adorableness. You won’t have to wash dishes for DAYS.
Say how you feel:
Never sure about announcing your feelings? Grab a bottle of Olives, make a little sign on it that says “olive you” and there you go. You’re adorable. And you’ve avoided using the big L word.
Make sure they aren’t one of those types who hate olives ( you know what they say, you either love them or you hate them… or you think they’re ok.) Because then you say “Olive you” and they say “I hate Olive” which doesn’t really make sense… But it would get awkward.
Pop one in a martini and get her drunk enough to want to touch you.