My Opinion: 11 Sexiest Men on the Planet

Taste. It’s a fickle thing. Pretty much the only thing unchanging about Opinions is that they change. Trends change. Fashion changes… and with it, so does what we find ‘attractive’.

I have ALWAYS found boys attractive. I never went through that ‘eew boys’ phase. Mine was always more of an ‘oooh, boys!’ However, my taste changes pretty by and large. Perhaps it is influenced by what movies I’m motivated by or what music I’m into (some cases, yes) I know that 10-15 years ago, these boys would have made my “hottest of all time” list.

Luckily  times have changed, and I survived the Backstreet’s Back and Millenium… and again. But for the most part we can’t explain it… we just find certain people ridiculously sexy.

Here is my new and Improved Perve list of 2012 people that I deem my favourites. Because, well… we all deserve a little eye candy. And Plus I get to google search for them. Hubba Hubba.

11. Ryan Gosling

Save the Ryan-oh

What list would be complete without the Ryans? (see below for the Ryan Sequel) The Gosling had us as soon as we realised how much this baby goose loved his Allie in the epic Noah loves Allie tale of The Notebook… after that he could do no wrong. He’s just the right amount of weird and quirky to make us believe he’d be perfect boyfriend material.

I dare you to find a Gosling cuter…

And in case we weren’t head over heels already – he swooned the pants off Emma Stone (and us) in Crazy Stupid love.. with that effing sexy Dirty Dancing routine and a tounge so quick with words, it makes us wonder what else it can do…

The Money Shot! Emma Stone NOT kicking that body out of bed…

10. Ryan Reynolds

50 Shades of Grey that I wouldn’t mind reading…

He dated Alanis Morrisette so we know he can handle his crazy. He was the incomparable Van Wilder, so we know he’s awesome and funny. He was also with Scarlett Johanssen so we know he’s super far out of our league.

He shot ‘Safe House’ here in SA and won us all over with his use of Afrikaans in the movie… word on the street was he was a pretty awesome human being too. (Of course. Beauty like that comes with a legal bond to be nice)

Enough talk. More abs.

Oh, hi honey, welcome home to heaven – i was just mowing the lawn…

9. Jim Sturgess

Jim Sturgess

After the American overdrive of abs it’s time for some culture. *opens yogurt* Aside from his sultry good looks in that Brit-Pop kind of way, Jim Sturgess acts in the kind of movies that convinces us all he’s intelligent and soulful. ‘Across the Universe’ is one of my all time favourite films, and of course he sings in it too.

All You Need Is Love (and me)

He’s got the sexy accent, the cool art films and that quirky look that doesn’t immediately scream ‘hotty’ but lures us in. If you’ve watched one of his films and don’t walk away swooning, then best you’d check your pulse… you might be dead… or worse… a vampire.

Jim Sturgess in One Day

8. Robert Pattinson

Team Edward

Yes, Haters gon’ hate. I like the guy from Twilight. It gets worse, I like the other guy too – so if you really hate tween-pop culture, skip number 7 also.

I have a thing for guys with the name Robert.

But hear me out… He’s hot. Screw your judgement and your hipster assumptions against a very beautiful love story between a dead mythical character and the most one dimentional female lead ever. “meh”.

He’s quite friendly when he’s human…

Every time I see him on TV, I inhale and exhale with a shudder. For that reason he has to make this list… (remember the Backstreet Boys? Let me be)

7. Taylor Lautner

Team Jacob

Now what is a hot blooded female supposed to do with imagery like this? He is 10 years younger than me. This makes me a little ill to my stomach, but then I turn to Demi Moore for some sisterhood highfives.

He is ridiculously hot. With that body, that smile, that cute little All American personality.  If Exhibit A (above) didn’t convince you, might I present Exhibit B:

What’s a cougar to do?

I rest my case.

6. Usher

His pits smell like sex and money

This one needs very little explanation.He sings, he dances, he’s a successful producer and …. that body. He’s just a sexy, sexy human being. Also, refreshingly devoid of any scandal. I will stop what I am doing if an Usher video comes on TV… just to prevent getting drool on whatever I am doing.

Ush Ush Ushhher

He’s a nice guy. And a smart guy. And the bling doesn’t hurt. (did I mention the dancing?)

aaand… dimples. *sigh*

5. Pharrell

Speaking of music genius… what list would be complete without this man:

Quintuple threat.

Pharrell is a quintuple threat: a rapper, singer, record producer, composer, and fashion designer. The only thing he needs to do is be a combination toaster and tumble dry clothes, then he can replace every need you might possibly have. (Plus I think his name is sexy. Weird names are hot to me, Angel.)

He might not be on the most conventional of lists. But watch one music video of him, or one live performance and I DARE you not to find him sexy…

There’s something about his high cheekbones and swagger everytime I hear one of his tracks I hear myself musing.. ‘damn, Pharrell is sexy’. And he just is.

He is other.

I’m crossing my arms to protect you from all my awesome…

He oozes it. From his voice, his producing fingers, his movements, his mind… and i bet he smells sexy too.

Cleaning up so good…

4. Gerard Butler

PS I love you… BTW I heart u

Gerard. He was the epitome of MAN in 300 as he lead the troops (topless) into the epic Greek war epic… then he was the epitome of LOVE in PS I love You where he was THEE most perfect husband ever… who dies… *spoiler alert* But men want to be him, girls want to be with him… hell – MEN probably want to be with him.

Thank You Google…

He also has the Scottish accent. The Brogue. The Eyes. The Stubble. The Smile… I have actually met him and conversed with him a few times… and trust me. It’s all I can do to not undress spontaneously at the mere memory.

This Is Sparta…


3. Thor

Speaking of Movie Greek Gods:

Thor aka Chris Hemsworth

What lady doesn’t want a Greek God in the bedroom, or is he an Ancient Nordic God? Either way… he’s a god. In case you were in doubt about ‘gods’ and ‘false idols’ and if it was all ok?… Prepare to worship:

Thor rhymes with Phwoarrr!

His real name is Chris Hemsworth and he’s an Aussie (but we forgive him) besides, what I have in mind doesn’t require much talking…

The Only ’50 shades of Grey’ bondage I’m interested in…
And he cleans up good too…

2. Will Smith

One of my longest standing ‘sexiest’ men. He has recently jumped back up my list with THIS poster:

The Difference between him and you is that HE make this look GOOD, BETTER, BEST!

The Fresh Prince who doesn’t swear in his rap to sell records… but when you describe him, it’s the only thing that will suffice: FUCK, he’s hot!

Ever since his sideways cap and he went to live with his Uncle and his Auntie in Belair… he’s been stealing hearts and looking FINE.  He can do no wrong in my eyes… Bad Boys? Hubba hubba. Independence Day. Pursuit of Happiness… The BODY in Ali and I am Legend… and how hot was that sex scene in 7 Pounds?! *shudder*

Every Girl Loves a Bad Boy.


The Champ is here!
Will Smith for President

And now, the number one sexiest thing in my world of 2012:

1. My Blackberry.

Yes. It’s true. It’s the most important part of my life. Without it I would have no connection to the world that matters. It’s my most intimate relationship. I kiss it when it gives me good news, and throw it when it gives me bad news… If only men were as pliable. Plus with the unreliability of RIM, my BB goes down on me more often than any man.

Once you go Black, you never go back..

*Sexy high five*


About YesReallyAngel

quirky, sardonic, sarcastic, ironic, satirical girl. Lover of marshmallows and high-fives.
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3 Responses to My Opinion: 11 Sexiest Men on the Planet

  1. laura says:

    Talk about a way to make someone smile on a Monday morning! These guys are definitely high on the eye-candy charts! I watch “Crazy, Stupid Love” every time it’s on TV just to see Ryan Gosling at his sexiest!

  2. Danielle says:

    “time for some culture *opens yogurt*” Ha ha ha ha!!
    Three cheers for two oh-so-delicious Ryan’s :D

    • YesReallyAngel says:

      Indeed. The Ryans deserve to be higher up the list, but for their sheer predictability I had to knock em off first. :) glad you liked my “culture”

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